Ever met a man who’s in church every week, knows the right lingo, but deep down is spiritually limp? No backbone. No fire. No fight. Just drifting.
If you’ve ever wondered how to become that kind of ineffective Christian man – the kind who looks the part but never really follows Christ – then this tongue-in-cheek guide is for you. Below is your playbook for becoming a low-value Christian man.
(Of course, this is satire. Don’t do these things! Unless you want to stay weak and useless to the Kingdom, of course.)
1. Neglect Prayer and Scripture
Want to stay spiritually powerless? Easy. Never open your Bible unless the pastor tells you to. Only talk to God when you’ve run out of options.
I’ve been there, where I thought that somehow I’d grow just by listening to a contemporary Christian song or two every now and then. But if I’m not in prayer and the Word, I’m starving my soul.
Keep your Bible on the shelf as a symbol of how “busy” you are. Make prayer something you “get to when you can.” Before long, your spiritual life will dry up like a plant that hasn’t been watered in months.
Psalm 1:2 says that a godly man delights in the law of the Lord and meditates on it day and night. So if you’d rather stay low-value, skip the delighting and keep scrolling.
2. Outsource Your Spiritual Growth
Why take responsibility for your faith when others can do it for you? Just let your wife handle the spiritual leadership. Let your pastor handle your convictions. Watch a few Christian video stories or reels on social media and call it “discipleship.”
I used to think listening to sermons online was enough. But information isn’t transformation. If I’m not applying it, I’m just collecting trivia about God.
Philippians 2:12 tells us to “work out your own salvation with fear and trembling.” That means your growth is your job. If you don’t train spiritually, don’t be shocked when your faith stays flabby.
3. Avoid Accountability at All Costs
Every low-value Christian man knows this secret: never let anyone close enough to challenge you. Keep things surface-level. Smile big, say “Naw…I’m good, brother,” and make sure no one ever sees your weaknesses.
That way, your sin can stay hidden, your pride can stay intact, your porn habit can remain active, and your friendships can stay shallow. It’s the perfect recipe for spiritual isolation.
I learned that real growth started when I finally let godly men speak into my life. It’s uncomfortable at first—but necessary.
Proverbs 27:17 says, “Iron sharpens iron, and one man sharpens another.” But if you want to stay dull, make sure your life never collides with another man’s honesty.
4. Confuse Passivity with Humility
Here’s a great trick: convince yourself that real humility means never taking initiative. When your wife needs spiritual guidance, stay silent. After all, she’s pretty smart and runs the household pretty well. Let he take care of it. When your kids need direction, shrug it off. When truth needs defending, stay “neutral.”
Call it meekness. Call it tolerance. Call it anything but what it really is: cowardice.
I’ve had to learn that true humility doesn’t mean silence. It means stepping up to serve, even when I feel unqualified.
1 Corinthians 16:13 commands, “Be watchful, stand firm in the faith, act like men, be strong.” God doesn’t need passive spectators. He calls for men who lead, protect, and serve with strength under control.
5. Chase Comfort Instead of Calling
Low-value men live for convenience. They’ll pick hobbies over holiness, comfort over commitment, and ease over obedience. They’ll spend hours planning vacations but no time planning how to grow in Christ. They’ll take a better part of a couple of weeks trying to beat a video game, or devote hours in marathoning a new Netflix series, but never even think of investing in seeking out God’s Word, God’s will, or God’s wisdom.
I’ve caught myself falling into that trap; letting the good things of life crowd out the best things. Comfort feels good now, but it costs dearly later.
Luke 9:23 says, “If anyone would come after Me, let him deny himself and take up his cross daily.” That means real manhood starts where self-indulgence ends. If your faith never costs you anything, you’re not following – you’re just spectating.
6. Treat Church Like a Spectator Sport
Want to ensure lifelong mediocrity? Treat church like an ESPN Sunday highlight reel. Show up late, sit in the back, evaluate the sermon, and slip out before anyone notices you.
Never serve. Never join a group. Never contribute. Never introduce yourself or talk to anyone. That way, you’ll never have to be known, challenged, or held responsible.
Or worse yet, rarely show up for any services. Is the weather grey and rainy? Eh, it’s a good day to sleep in. Is the weather nice? Then it’s the perfect time to spend your Sunday outside doing some other activities.
Hebrews 10:24–25 reminds us not to neglect meeting together, but to encourage one another. Church is not a streaming show. It’s not an optional event. It is commanded by Almighty God in His Word for His glory and for your benefit, as it’s where real men grow, serve, and fight shoulder-to-shoulder for God’s Kingdom.
Final Word: Don’t Stay Low-Value
All humor aside, there’s a serious point here. Too many men are drifting through life with no spiritual urgency. They love Jesus in theory but deny Him in practice.
I’ve been guilty of that drift myself. It doesn’t happen overnight, as the slide into apathy can take a while.
The good news? Christ delights in redeeming low-value men. He transforms cowards into warriors, spectators into servants, and weaklings into leaders.
So if you saw yourself in any of this, don’t stay there. Repent. Recommit. Restart.
Get back into the Word. Build accountability. Lead at home. Pray hard. Serve faithfully.
You don’t need to be perfect. Just be present and obedient. Because in the Kingdom of God, low-value men don’t stay low-value once they start following the High King.
Step Up and Lead Like a Warrior Disciple
Men, it’s time to stop drifting and start leading. If this post challenged you, don’t just close the tab and move on. Take the next step toward becoming the man God has called you to be.
Warrior Disciple is a hands-on discipleship resource that equips men to live, lead, and fight for the faith in everyday life. Whether you’re leading a small group or walking with a few brothers, this manual will help you build spiritual strength that lasts.
Visit WarriorDisciple.org to learn more, get your copy, and start leading men toward Christ-centered manhood today.
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