In his first letter to Timothy, Paul instructed his young protege on different areas, one of which was the right posture to have towards young women:
“Treat younger men as brothers, older women as mothers and younger women as sisters, with absolute purity.” (1 Timothy 2:1-2, NIV. Emphasis added).
Paul’s words are highly relevant in our oversexualized world. Men are constantly trained to view women as beautiful commodities, even while watching a movie. It is common for young men to list women as products for a party, and purity in male circles seems nonexistent. Unfortunately, many women are both victims and willing participants in their objectification.
We have a Problem
A 2024 study reported by Tulane University revealed that 82% of female respondents have experienced some form of sexual harassment in their lifetime, ranging from catcalls to direct assaults. Men are victims too, but the rate is heavily unequal, and it’s not hard to see why.
The average young man has a sexual desire often likened to fire. Contained fire in a fireplace provides warmth, but the same fire in a forest will wreak havoc.
Male sexual desire has provided both warmth and chaos.
Interestingly, men do not often approach their sisters the same way. They wouldn’t want other men making catcalls, and may even throw fists at a friend who makes an inappropriate comment.
What changes? With sisters, the man is aware of the whole person and desires to see her flourish, not get hurt. In theological terms, they see her as made in God’s image.
Women are made in God’s Image
The first chapter of Genesis contains a verse that grounds humanity’s intrinsic dignity: “So God created mankind in his own image, in the image of God he created them; male and female he created them.” (Genesis 1:27, NIV)
Women also have this intrinsic dignity. Like men, they are made in God’s image, the foundation that must drive how we honor them. Since they resemble their Creator, we sin heavily when we reduce them to objects for our satisfaction.
Most men intuitively perceive the woman’s dignity when relating with their sisters. They know she’s more than her physical charms. They’ve seen her struggle with the flu, cry at a movie, and have goals.
God, through the Apostle Paul, wants us to view all young women with the same lens of dignity.
Purity protects Men too
So far, we’ve established the dangers of unrestrained male desire towards women, the imago dei foundation of women’s dignity, and how men’s natural aptitude to protect their sisters can help us grasp Paul’s instructions. Another angle to consider is how purity helps men too. To paraphrase another insightful saying from Paul, godliness has its advantages in our present lives. (1 Timothy 4:8).
Proverbs 25:28 likens a person without self-control to a city without walls. Vulnerable. Unprotected. The opposite is also true, of course. A man with self-control stays free from addiction, preserves his dignity, maintains his reputation, and even his physical well-being.
Additionally, he guards his mind from distortions that would make him dehumanise women and lead to foolish, impulsive decisions.
These benefits apply to every man, but even more to those in ministry. The pain of watching a sound teacher’s ministry crash is not worth the fleeting pleasures of lust.
How Do We Treat Younger Women as Sisters?
Practically speaking, there are three steps we can take: unlearn, learn, and relearn.
Unlearn
Men learn a lot of unhelpful lessons about women. Some are taught to fear women or treat them like trash. Others see any lady as a potential tool or nothing more than a romantic pursuit. All of these should be unlearned.
The steps may include unsubscribing from that channel or cancelling Netflix. It could mean unfollowing some influencers, or placing boundaries on the conversations you have.
Learn
Next, we must renew our minds to see women as God intended. The core source of this renewal is Scripture itself. In it, we have stories of women like Deborah, Jael, Priscilla, Tabitha, Sarah, and the Samaritan woman.
Scripture also extols the beauty that should be prioritized. As the Apostle Peter puts it, “your beauty should not come from outward adornment…it should be that of your inner self, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is of great worth in God’s sight.”(1 Peter 3:3-4 NIV)
If we learn to value the lasting inner beauty of character over that of the outer, we’re less likely to be deceived by charm. Rather, we’ll celebrate the women around us without putting them on a pedestal.
We can further read biographies of godly women in the past, undertake a study on biblical femininity, and expose ourselves to media that portray women as full humans.
Relearn
Change is a gradual process, and sanctification is lifelong, especially if you come from a sexually broken past (or are currently struggling). We must remain apprentices of Christ, taking his footsteps in how he treated women. Community matters as well, for we need other brothers also committed to purity.
Jesus taught us that the second greatest commandment is to love our neighbors as ourselves. Let us love our young sisters by treating them as sisters. Indeed, they have the same Creator and are in the same family within the church.
